Gave My Boyfriend an Ultimatum- Me or Drugs- How Long Do I Wait?

Question by : Gave my boyfriend an ultimatum- me or drugs- how long do i wait?
after saying to him its me or drugs, how long should i give him?

should i leave immediatley first sign of using or should i give him a set amount of time?

been together 2 years and he uses crack. i know its very addictive and i am scared he just wont be able to stop just like that. he doesnt like rehab so i dont know wht else he could do.

he says he wants to stop everytime but then goes off and keeps doing it.

we live together, he says he loves me so much and wants a life with me.

but how can we? ive tried to tell him so may times and now- 3 days in to 2010- i know i cannot stay another year hoping and praying he will stop. for me this is it, now or never. i just feel in my heart i cant stand the pain anymore even though i love him so much and wanted to be with him forever. i am trying to find my own strength and just get out of this drug cycle. ive never used drugs, and i hate them. but i love him.

what do i do? how long do i wait? do i just pack and walk away from him?

help! louise in england, uk xx

Best answer:

Answer by peanut
Leave him now. I suggest you run.

Answer by Gypsy Kid
Say to him that there is no way you can continue to live like this and you do understand that it can be hard to stop using, but if he shows no sign of progression and wanting to stop substance misuse then you will be leaving. If he does say he can’t do it, say that’s fine then I’ll start packing, you have to show him you are serious about this. If he comes around and says, I’ll go to the Doc asap and get help, then let him know you will stick by him through this. it can take a while though, he will go onto a methadone programme which will have slowly decreasing dosages until he is clear.

good luck either way, and just because he is ruining his life, you can’t let him ruin yours.

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